Catfight
by superninja
Summary: Cheetah shows up in Gotham. Really, a lame excuse to get Batman and Wonder Woman to flirt :D


Catfight

By superninja

All characters belong to DC Comics. This story is not intended for profit.

***

The dark within the cave had caused her to question her actions.

It was black as night inside and Wonder Woman wasn't sure if she had picked the right moment to intrude on the life of Batman.

Just as she was thinking of heading back to the transporter that would lead to the Watchtower, a light switched on, far above her as a long staircase was illuminated, and a dignified older man came down the steps, bearing a tray of tea.

He looked momentarily surprised to see Diana standing there, and she had no other recourse than to smile back at him.

"Ah," came the clipped British accent, "Good evening, Miss Diana."

"Hello Alfred," she replied.

She waited until Alfred was at the base of the stairs, and then questioned him.

"I'm looking for Bruce," she said plainly. "I was hoping he'd be here, but it seems he's out on patrol."

Alfred placed the tea settings down on a long table and walked towards her, casual as ever.

"When is he not on patrol?" he sniffed. "There was an incident earlier," he began. "He felt it necessary to confront it immediately."

Diana looked down at Alfred, and placed her hands on his shoulders.

"I know," she replied. "It's one of my adversaries. Cheetah."

Alfred looked up at her. "Yes, well, he didn't wish to wait for your reply…he simply vanished off into the night…as he sometimes does."

Diana watched Alfred intently. He stood stiffly before her, regarding her with an apologetic stare.

"You know," Diana began, "This version of Cheetah is different than any before." Alfred stood rigid, as she continued. "He's a metahuman. Enhanced by magic."

Alfred walked back to the tea tray, and hefted it, without a hitch.

"I'm sure Master Bruce can deal with this "Cheetah" effectively," he said with a slight sigh. He pointed the tray towards her. "Would you care for a cup of tea?"

***

Batman raced along the rooftops of his home.

Gotham. The city he protected. The city he loved. It was a living entity to him, this tangle of streets, sewers and sin.

The call had come not from the light of the Bat Signal, but from the police jargon he had picked up from Oracle. It seemed that once again, another costumed hero was unable to contain their metahuman menaces within their own territories, and now it was loose in his city.

"Batman," came Oracle over his intercom. "There's an incoming message from Wonder Woman."

He merely grunted a response as she continued, as he landed lightly on the roof of the warehouse, and stalked to the window, carefully peering down through it.

Oracle sighed, impatient. "Should I send her a reply?"

"No," he said darkly. "And tell her…"

"Let me guess," Oracle interrupted. "Stay out of my city?"

"That's right," he answered.

****

"Miss," Alfred began, "I'm sure that he wouldn't want you to act…inappropriately."

"What do you mean?" Diana asked, ready. He had clearly noticed her getting cagey, waiting for Batman to reply to the message Alfred had sent on the computer's communications channel through Oracle.

"It is important that Batman maintains his image of urban myth, undaunted by the criminals that pervade our home."

"I know, I know," she replied, rolling her eyes. "'Stay out of my city' and all that nonsense." She became serious again, and narrowed her eyes. "Cheetah, very recently, went toe to toe with Superman. He knocked him unconscious, Alfred." She watched as Alfred twitched slightly.

"He doesn't approve of metahuman force," Alfred said resolutely. "Not in Gotham, at least."

Diana sighed and looked across the cave, trying to come up with a solution without compromising Alfred's duties to Bruce. Her eyes stopped, as they fell on a costume propped up in a display case. A Robin costume.

"What if I didn't appear so…metahuman?" she asked slyly.

Alfred followed her eyes to the Robin costume, as his eyebrows shot up to his hairline (or lack thereof). She watched him tap his finger against his jaw, clutching his elbow in the other hand.

"Hmm…" he said. "I doubt you could even fit into the costume, and Master Bruce might not approve of its use. That was Master Todd's old costume."

Diana instantly felt her stomach drop at her suggestion. Bruce had lost his ward, Jason Todd to the Joker in an incredible act of violence, and it was one of his most painful memories, although he rarely spoke of it to her.

She met Alfred's eyes apologetically, and was surprised to find him still pondering her suggestion. "Or," she thought, "Thinking of a polite way to kick me out."

He left her momentarily, as she placed her hands on her hips, wondering what he was up to. Alfred returned bearing a large lock box, and set it on the worktable. Pulling his keys from his pocket, he fumbled with them for a moment, before choosing a large iron key.

"There we are," he said, looking over it again before setting it into the keyhole. She stood over him as he turned the key, and then pushed the lid away.

Diana looked inside, and saw a purple costume inside, a bullwhip and what looked like a pair of cat ears attached to a hood. "Catwoman?" she said apprehensively.

"Yes," Alfred said, pulling the costume from the box, and began shaking the dust off it. "From one of the many times she was convinced to, ahem, reform." He exchanged a sideways glance with Diana. "One of the *many* times," he finished, with what Diana thought was an air of disapproval.

"I don't know if it will fit," Diana replied.

He looked back at her with a very curt grin, appraising her own costume. "You seem to favor spandex. It will stretch, no doubt."

Handing the costume over to her, she turned and walked around the corner to change.

"Oh, and Miss Diana?" he called after her. "Have a little fun with it."

Alfred smiled and closed the lock box, taking it back to the trophy room.

***

Peering down through the skylight, Batman watched as Cheetah barked orders, with a small group of what Batman believed to be hired thugs behind him. They looked sloppy, but it was clear Cheetah was trying to show some muscle.

Manny the Mouth was crouched on the floor, bleeding, as his gang stood over him, unsure of what to do.

Batman had done his research on Cheetah. Metahuman, probably the same class as Wonder Woman, if not more. He had taken Clark out, recently. But Batman didn't care. This vermin had dared to invade his city, and he was going to purge him just like any other common criminal.

It was all a matter of his approach, and using the Cheetah's weaknesses against him. There were twelve men down there all together. The others wouldn't be difficult to disarm.

Batman's thoughts drifted, however, as he noticed a figure land on the edge of the roof, darting quickly out of his view.

So…someone else had taken an interest in Cheetah's activities. He thought briefly of Wonder Woman, but the flashback in his head told him the movements of the intruder didn't match hers. Maybe it was Batgirl, or Oracle. The female form was unmistakeable.

Narrowing his eyes, he crawled into the shadows, determined to deal with this new threat rather than go after Cheetah.

As he rounded the corner of the rooftop entrance, he watched the intruder dive again into the shadows along the roof, following its perimeter. She knew he was onto her, and was leading him on. Not the typical behavior for someone like Batgirl or Oracle. Maybe the Huntress?

He didn't get the chance to make another guess as his feet were whipped out from under him, and rolling, he dodged a second blow, taking the constricting grasp of a bullwhip around his right arm.

"Catwoman," he said angrily.

He gave a tug, and pulled her forward. To her credit, she gave very little, still remaining in the shadows.

"Hello, Batman," she purred. "Is that a Batarang in your pocket, or you just happy to see me?"

He let go of the whip, unamused, as she snapped it back up, wrapping the coils around her arm.

"What do you want with Cheetah?" he said, ignoring her crude remarks.

"A catfight," she grinned back at him.

"Stay-out-of-my-way," he said, gritting his teeth.

"Only if you stay out of mine, tall, dark and bat-like."

He turned his back on her, and strode back towards the skylight, peering down to see Manny's thugs placing their weapons on the ground.

Soon, she was at his side, looking down with him. His nostrils caught a scent on her. Something seemed…different.

"Don't worry," she breathed. "I showered tonight. Too bad you weren't there."

He ignored her again, but he was trying to think of the best way to keep Catwoman out of this. It was probable she didn't know how strong Cheetah was, and he didn't want to waste his time trying to protect her in the thick of a fight.

"You go through the front," he said, barking orders. "I'll go through the skylight." He pursed his lips and looked back at her, noticing she had stepped into the shadows again. "Stay away from Cheetah."

"Cheetah is mine," she said.

Rising up his heels, he leaned forward towards her, and peered into her eyes through the darkness. "Don't…" he started in. But then he stopped. Her eyes! They were the wrong color.

He lowered himself back down, and crossed his arms, his eyes blazing towards her.

"Diana, I thought I told you…" he started.

"Diana who?" she said innocently.

He fumed, pointing a finger up at her, and growled back: "Not in my city. I told you…"

She smiled back at him, and crossed her arms behind her back. "I heard the good ones never listen."

His cape swept around him, bathing him in darkness, as though he was withdrawing into himself. "Drop the femme fatale act," he shot back. "It doesn't work for you." 

Batman turned back to the skylight, and glanced again at the scene below. Cheetah had Manny's men unpacking several crates, although the contents were still hidden.

Diana looked down next to him, muttering under her breath, "It was working for me…" She watched the gangsters heft the crates down to the floor, as others pried them open with crowbars. "They're unmarked," she said, "Weapons?"

Batman looked back at her, his fading annoyance still evident on his features. "You tell me."

Wonder Woman sighed. "You can't take Cheetah. He took out Clark. He's defeated me in the past. One good blow and it'll be over. Let me handle him."

Batman controlled his anger, trying to minimize his breathing. "You distract Cheetah, and I'll take him out."

"What?!" she replied in a hushed whisper.

Batman turned back towards her, and Wonder Woman relaxed as he finally started talking straight with her. "He won't expect you to have any metahuman abilities. You can surprise him."

"Alright," she started. "His powers are magic based. I don't know how well either of us can combat that directly."

"You trust me?" he asked her.

They were a team now. She felt guilty for deceiving him before, but answered quickly, "Yes."

"Just don't go overboard," he said, as she ran towards the roof's edge. She looked back briefly to see him crouching on the edge of the skylight, ready to pounce.

***

Wonder Woman plunged through the front doors.

Raising her whip, she quickly disarmed the two thugs nearest her, trying to minimize her speed.

Cheetah turned towards her, growling, as the thugs unpacking the crates went for their weapons.

Just then, a crash came from the ceiling, and she watched as Batman disarmed two men by landing on top of them, and Cheetah looked away from her and towards Batman instead.

Everyone was looking at Batman, and she used the opportunity to knock out the two men she had disarmed, and to land a couple of punches to two others.

Batman was engaging a trio of men that cornered him, easily dispatching them.

Wonder Woman watched Cheetah, torn as to whom he should engage first. Another thug raised his gun towards her, and rolling her eyes, she did a somersault behind the crates, wishing she had her bracelets. She heard the sound of the man being taken out in mid-fire, and jumped from behind the crates.

"Hey, big boy?" she said, looking at Cheetah, wiggling her finger toward him. "When's the last time you had a good 'ol fashioned catfight?"

Cheetah stormed towards her, as Batman continued fighting the thugs behind him. Cheetah launched himself at her, and she sidestepped him, but he recovered quickly. Issuing her bullwhip, she struck Cheetah twice, as he laughed at her. Striking at him again, he grabbed the whip, and jerked, dragging her towards him.

"Hello, kitty," he said with a sneer.

"Meow," she replied. And taking her clawed gloves, she used her strength to draw a mark down Cheetah's face, not unlike the one he had given her months earlier.

Cheetah screamed, and clutched at his face, at the same time, throwing her away with great force.

Diana went with the blow, and landed in a thud against the far wall.

She looked up, and saw that Batman was nowhere to be found, although the unconscious bodies littering the floor told her he was waiting for the right moment to strike.

Cheetah, now clutching his scratched face, lumbered towards her, single-mindedly.

"I'll kill you for that," he bellowed. He'd totally forgotten Batman.

Diana got slowly to her feet, just as Cheetah grabbed her around the throat. Suddenly, he looked around the room, seeing the bodies of the thugs on the floor.

"Where's your boyfriend…?"

***

They watched from the rooftop as the police, and a special unit for metahumans, cleaned the scene up.

"What was in that tranquilizer dart?" Diana asked Bruce. Batman was standing on the ledge, his cape swirling about him. "The Bat-Pose," she thought to herself as he jumped from the edge and grabbed her arm after him.

"Let's go," he said.

She started to take to the sky, but he pulled her back down, as best he could.

"We'll take the car," he replied, answering her forlorn stare.

They jumped across the rooftops, Diana following him, and trying to control her urge to simply fly.

Reaching a dark alley, Batman pressed a button on his gauntlet, and his car came into view.

Leaping down into the alley (although she much lighter than he), they bounded for the car as the automatic controls slid back the hood revealing the interior.

Batman quickly replaced the hood as a couple of children looked into the alley. As they whisked away, Diana watched their faces, and swore she heard one of them say, "Batman…" in a breath of excitement.

Tearing down the streets, she glanced over at him.  


"Do you have your own decoder ring, yet?"

"Very funny," he said, although his expression had no trace of humor. He put on the speed, as they pressed on through the city, past the tall buildings and out toward the hilly outskirts of town.

***

"Master Bruce," said Alfred. "I trust everything went well?"

Bruce jumped from the seat of the Batmobile, and gave Alfred a pointed stare. "I think Diana could use a change of costume, but other than that, everything's fine."

Diana could perceive the animosity of his words as she jumped out after him. She paused for a moment, wondering why she didn't fly instead.

Alfred nodded, and then picked up the tea tray that was still resting on the worktable.

"Only Miss Diana knows where she left her costume," he said curtly. "Would you like some of your dinner, Master Bruce? I know *cold* lamb chops aren't exactly in vogue these days, but…"

"I'm fine," he replied shortly, pulling back his cowl.

When Alfred had made his way up the stairs, Diana glanced over at Bruce. "Don't blame him."

"Of course I blame him," Bruce said, sitting at his computer and calling up a screen to add to his case logs, and began typing.

"Bruce, I terrified him about Cheetah. I told him that Cheetah took out Clark." Bruce ignored her and continued his entry. "At least admit that everything turned out well tonight," she continued. "There were no casualties, Cheetah was captured…"

She watched him bring up his data file on Cheetah, making rapid notes.

"Great Hera, you are stubborn," she breathed.

Bruce gave an errant tap, and then turned towards her. "Only as much as you. You should never have come to Gotham." He crossed his arms. "I wish you would…"

Diana raised an eyebrow and stared back down at him. "I played by your rules, and it was a success."

He turned away from her and continued his entry. "What I was saying, is that I wish you would respect my wishes." Tapping a single key particularly hard, he paused. 

"You were no match for Cheetah," she returned haughtily. "Maybe your dart would've worked without me distracting him, but you have no way of knowing. And even if you *did* find a distraction, the blow that he gave me might have ended up with someone dying." She paused, remembering her earlier question. "By the way, what was in that dart?"

Bruce rose from his chair, and met her near the Watchtower transporter. He leaned his arm against the railing.

"It was a tranquilizer, with enough juice to take out a herd of elephants."

Diana gave him a quizzical look, and crossed her arms.

"You know," he began, "Clark is vulnerable to magic. If someone were to control him, I had to have a counteroffensive prepared."

She was slightly annoyed at Bruce's constant habit of finding ways to undermine the members of the JLA. He made a mental note of her reaction, and continued.

"I had Zatanna hex a tranquilizer dart. It had a counter-spell on it that would make the target bereft of magic."

Diana had to admit that she was impressed. "You do think of everything," she said bluntly.

Bruce stared back at her challengingly.

"Don't trick me again," he warned. "I'll never fall for it twice."

Diana turned away towards the transporter, and shot over her shoulder:

"I'll be sure to launder the costume before returning it to you."

He watched her depart, leaping into the chamber, and then whisked away.

"No rush," he said, with a grin, and went back to his computer to finish the report.

The End


End file.
